Supposedly emo post

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Sometimes I do wonder when I wish for bigger boobs, how much do I really want them? I definitely don't want huge ass ones like Pamela Anderson. Not even inclined towards a C cup. And if I had to sacrifice my waist for a bigger bust, I'd rather stick to my dancer's body. And don't tell me otherwise.

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How is it that a man can fill my mind that I think of no one else but him. I feel such a great sense of pity, not for him or me, but us and the ties between. Once bitten twice shy. So I told him we cannot, no matter what. No matter why. Now I wonder what would happen instead. If I had not said anything before answering yes, yes indeed. Man proposes, God disposes. My plans were never meant to be. All the talk to steer things "right" ended up beyond foresight. So my frivolous mind starts to run now into the realms of what never begun.

What if we didn't agree from the start, what if I didn't lay down the rules, what if he asked me then, what if I said yes, what if he asked me when, what if we hence began, What if what if. And all questions lead to one. Would we still be friends again?

How long can it last before the inevitable must happen. How long can we last after then?

Love. What a foolish thing it is.